Why do I have 3 titles for this post? Well instead of making different posts for each one I decided to combine them. :)
One would think that 9 years in the military would make me good at saying goodbye. Honestly it is just as hard today as it was when I left my family almost 9 years ago for an adventure I will forever be grateful for. Over the next few months we will be saying a lot of goodbyes. I am trying to prepare myself once again to say bye to dear friends, knowing that with some of them our paths will not cross again, at least for this life. I learned a long time ago the hard way that often when two friends part their friendship grows distant with life and miles getting in the way. Most the time your love for them never fades leaving a part of them with you always. Over the years phone calls/eamils get less and less and before you know it you really don't know who they are anymore. It takes work on both sides to keep a friendship strong when distance and time is between it. I have also learned that just because you don't talk to someone everyday like before doesn't mean that it has to change everything. I love it when I talk to an old friend on the phone and it is like we were never apart. And so the old saying goes, "some people come in our lives for only a season and some are there to stay for a lifetime." Both I feel are equally important having helped shape and are shaping you into who you are! I love the song, " A circle is round it has no end that's how long I am going to be your friend. Make new friends, but keep the old. One is silver and the other is gold"! Having said goodbye to soo many close friends over the years whom I still love today just as much as I did when we were together I choose to keep this song my theme song! :)
Today we said goodbye to Britt, my neice. I know I will see her very soon, but it was hard to say bye. She has become a part of us. It was hard for me to let her go, but I know she needs to be there for her family. She is going to be their rock, I know it. She is so much like me, this is good and bad. LOL Watching her grow in so many ways has been a joy. I can not even begin to tell you how she as blessed our lives.
Was it easy to have an 18 year old girl with a lot of attitude in my house who is just like me you ask? NO! There were sacrifices made on both parts that is for sure. BUT, I have learned more in the last few months about myself, teenagers, how the gospel really changes people making them better than before, and that following feelings/promptings is an amazing blessing. Britt if you are reading this, we love you!
It seems as though over the last year James and I have had so many feelings to do certain things. Feelings that at first we could have never imagined the reasons we were following them or their outcome. First it was for me to go home for Christmas last year while James was deployed. I fought and fought with this feeling not wanting to fly by myself etc. Of course I listened (I know it is just as bad when you fight the feeling as it to not listen, that is for another post ha). We will be forever grateful that we listened. James' Aunt Kathy past away after a car accident took her life just two short months later. While I was in AZ for Christmas Aunt Kathy got to meet Tanner and DeeDee got love on her. I have her on video singing to James. James obviously didn't get to say goodbye. That video with just a few moments of Aunt Kathy will be something he will cherish forever. Then it was for Tanner and I to stay longer after her funeral while James and DeeDee went home so I would be able to attend my neice Chantel's wedding (Britt's older sister). I was never really sure the reason I stayed for Channy's wedding other than I love her and would have never forgiven myself for missing it, until now. Because I stayed James and I were able to invite Birttani out here, and she was able to accept. We had a strong feeling that she needed to come. Which she said last night saved her life. :) Who knew? Who ever knows why they get the feelings they get, and what they mean? Sometimes it is evident right away what that feeling meant, sometimes we don't know for a long time, and sometimes we never know. I know there are times when the Lord just simply wants us to be obeident, and there are times when it is for a reason; sometimes big sometimes small.
I know I am so grateful for a gospel/parents/church leaders that have taught me to listen to the still small voice and follow on faith alone not knowing why at first. I am also grateful for a gospel that taught me that really there are no goodbyes. For family, knowlege, and friends are the only things we can take with us when we leave this world.
And so, I think I am prepared as much as I can be for the next coming months which will most definitely be bitter sweet!
